grinding the valve stem has nothing to do with refacing the gasket surface on the cylinder head. If you look at a 1.6 head, you'll see the valve face is recessed into the head about .050 or so. The main reason a machinist would grind the tip of the valve stem is to remove a burr that may have worn onto the tip from the lifter bucket rubbing against it. Valve seats tend to sink after many miles of use, there is a limit to it before they must be replaced and that would be another reason to grind the valve stem tip. If the seat is sunk and the valve is refaced, the stem may stick up too high in the lifter bore meaning you would have to install a very thin shim (in mech. lifter engines) or in a bad case not be able to set the proper clearance at all and end up with a valve that stays open all the time. As with the valve face, you can only grind so much off the tip of the stem before you interfere with the keepers, at which point the valve is junk and needs to be replaced.